my girls

my girls
MacKenzie (Mac) age 11 and Camille (Mille) age 8 1/2

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Being a Mom is Hard Work

Oh my sweet Mille!  She is competing today for Ready Writing in UIL today.  I'm praying(been praying) that she does such a great job.  Of course every parent wants their child to be successful and do a good job on their activities but I'm praying Mille will do go more for Mille.  Sometimes my sweet girl doubts herself.  She doesn't believe that she can do things and stresses out about them.  When you do Ready Writing it's a personal narrative style of writing.  In class they've switched gears and are doing expository writing. This my friends is throwing her for a loop.  I think she feels like she has "mastered" the style of personal narrative and now right when she has gotten comfortable the style is completely different. My baby is like her mama, doesn't do well with change.  She's really struggling right now with Reading, I honestly think it is more mental than actually not "getting it."  She gets so stressed out and has major anxiety when she's about to take a reading test.  We had a major "Come to Jesus" talk, as Craig likes to put it, about believing in yourself and working hard.  I told her that I wanted her to come home from school tired because she had worked so hard at school that day.  Days (and nights!) like this are days when I realize how HARD being a parent is.  I told Mille yesterday that there are times I just want to grab her and shake her and tell her that she is an incredible person and that if she would just believe in herself and show everybody else how "shiny" she is her life would be butterflies and roses!  She thought this was funny but I am serious, it's so frustrating to see special gifts in your child but only to see that they don't realize they have them.  I sit and wonder why she is like this.  Did I do something when she was little to make her 2nd guess herself? Did I not build her up enough?Maybe I did or maybe that's just how she's wired.  What I do know is that my job as her mama is to help show her what an amazing young lady she is and help her share that gift with everybody else.  I might not get paid for my job, is there a price tag on molding and teaching beautiful creatures like the ones God blessed me with? Maybe not in the form of money but when I see my girls smile or do something kind for somebody else those are my proudest moments and that is when I see all the hard work as a mama paying off.  I pray that my sweet girl goes into this test this afternoon and remembers all the kind words I told her yesterday.  I hope she gets an inkling of the master piece I see.  I love my baby to the moon and back a million times!



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